The panic sets in. The sweat drips down your face. You can already feel your parents yelling at you. It’s not the end of a marathon or a sports game. No, it’s something much more serious than that.
Quarter 1 is closing.
You’ve been telling yourself since the first bad test grade that you had plenty of time to bring your 72 up to a 90. Plenty of time. You just need to do every extra credit opportunity (even those not offered), score 100 on the next 3 exams, and learn to juggle fire while balancing on a tightrope. You’re fine, no need to stress.
So even if you don’t check x2 until H period on October 28th, here are some last minute things you could do to pull up those grades and maybe survive your parent’s wrath Halloween weekend:
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Save your teacher’s life
Nothing says “Give me an A!” like saving your teacher from impending doom. Doesn’t have to be a fire; falling vending machines and shark attacks are also drastic enough situations to ensure the A.
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Beg for Forgiveness
Maybe your teacher will forget that you didn’t come to a single after school help session if you cry for a day or two straight. Baked goods and fruit baskets could also help in this method, depending on your teacher’s disposition. Never underestimate a few Benjamin’s or a gift card for the new Starbucks either. Teachers are going to need caffeine to stay up late and update x2 with your new and improved grade.
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Build a Neuralizer
I know the Men in Black reference is a bit outdated, but you can’t be picky when looking for last resorts. Also, if you have the time and energy and brains to build a neuralizer, you probably don’t need to use it, since you are a genius with intelligence that can rival that of a futuristic government. But having a device that can erase your teacher’s memory would be especially handy, mostly for making your teacher forget you never did your homework or proofread your papers.
Hope these tips help you all bring up your grade in this last crucial week. Or maybe you could just, I don’t know, study, go in for extra help, and do your homework? That or the neuralizer seem like safe bets. Even if it’s too late for this quarter, you still have time to save your semester grade if you change your habits now.
