Artwork by Edie Feldman

As prom comes closer, the fierce drama attacks of this dragon-like beast called the “Drama-gon” will only become more frequent and devastating. This tricky beast comes out each spring and lurks in the shadows. The Drama-gon claws through the minds of excited prom goers and feasts off their fairytale dreams, replacing them with melodramatic nightmares and stress. Most victims of the Drama-gon are usually rational people, but the pressure spawned by the Drama-gon possesses them with irrationality.

The Drama-gon takes all the fun out of prom, taunting boys that they’ll never find a date even with the most outrageous promposal that can be thought of, and whispering to girls that they look awful in every dress they put on.

The main roots of the Drama-gon’s evil doing are the irrational thoughts it inserts within the minds of its prey. Forcing victims to believe that a $500 dress and a limo are the only things that can allow you to have a good time, being voted prom king and queen is equivalent to being Prince William and Princess Kate, and should you not follow the perfect criteria necessary to have a “perfect” prom, the rest of your life will be disastrous.

Using these anxious thoughts, the Drama-gon creates stress and makes certain that the real reason for the existence of prom–to have fun–is forgotten.

However, there is method of combat to defeat the Drama-gon.

• Plain old rationality can defend against anything it throws at you.
• Keep your head and remember wearing the same dress as someone else will not be a bigger tragedy than the eruption of Mt. St. Helens.
• If you get rejected, it’s okay to be a little upset, but don’t get angry or start rumors–there are plenty of other people in the same situation as you and plenty of other people still waiting to be asked.
• Most importantly, remember that prom isn’t supposed to be anything besides fun.

If you ever become stressed about prom or drama begins to form around prom among your friends, just calm down and let it go.
Your prom memories will be much sweeter without the taint of the arguments it foraged. And when prom does end, it will be left to you as only a memory. It may be a big deal now, but that’s only because the Drama-gon wants you to believe that all of this has real significance for your entire life.

Enjoy yourself during prom and all the exciting time leading up to the dance, but don’t forget to pack your brain and its glorious rational thoughts while you pack your money to go to the mall. Leave the Drama-gon in its shadowy depths and enjoy the time with your friends.

Save the real stress and anxiety for something that lasts more than four hours.